A Lesson of God's care from a Skunk!

“Walk further down than usual today. No, don’t have time, need to get to church. You will get to church; it’s not much further to the next block.”

And so this conversation went in my head. I sensed an overwhelming push to keep walking on this warm, sunny morning. I knew I could do it and get back in time for a shower before service. I just felt lazy if truth be told.
The inner voice won and I continued walking to the next street where I turned around and headed where the path turned.
Deep in thought I almost missed the scene ahead. A small black animal with a white stripe down his back and tail was running onto the path and then back into the wooded area where I could not see him.
Stopping to think about the situation I again saw the animal run onto the path then back into the woods.
“What the heck was this skunk doing?” I didn’t have time to go back the way I came, but I certainly did not want to get sprayed either.
“I will wait until he runs back into the trees and then I will run as quickly as I can past him.” I thought.
With my left foot behind me and the right ahead I braced myself for the run. My heart raced as I thought about the possibility of running smack into this little creature. But I had to take the chance.
Sprinting quickly I got to the place the skunk had run onto the pathway. I looked to my left to see if he was coming back out again. My mouth dropped open as I took in the sight. The skunk was running in circles inside the clearing. He had something on his face. I looked closer; it was a yogurt cup! I stood very still as I considered my options.
“I can’t leave him like this.” I thought to myself. “What if he suffocates to death?”

I walked quietly into the clearing and spoke softly. Little by little the animal came closer to me. I sat down and continued to speak to him. I knew I was taking a chance of being sprayed; yet, a voice within was telling me to go ahead. Now I wondered how I would get the cup off this little guy’s face. He just sat there as if knowing I would be able to help him. Slowly I grabbed onto the cup and pulled. To my horror it would not budge. Now what?

“I could take him home with me and cut the object off his nose.” I thought out loud. I smiled as I imagined the look of surprise on my husbands face as I walked into the house with a skunk announcing I had a new pet.

“Get serious,” I scolded myself. There was one other option, hold onto his back and pull with all my might. I sat up in a ready position in case I needed to take off quickly. I prayed silently to myself for God’s help; after all wasn’t he the one pushing me to walk further on? Perhaps He had sent me to save one of His creatures. He takes care of the birds of the air doesn’t he? I slowly placed my right hand on his back; gently and carefully with my left hand I pulled on the cup.

What a surprise when the little guy reached up and placed his black claws inside the cup at the exact moment I began to pull. It was as if he knew I needed his help as well. The cup fell off. He quickly strutted off onto the path away from me. I stood up in disbelief. I had just had a close up and personal contact with a wild skunk. No one would believe this, how could they?

As I walked on home I pondered on my amazing experience. If I had not listened to that inner voice telling me to walk a bit further I would not have met up with the skunk. He would have suffered longer and perhaps died.

I smiled as I thought about God’s loving mercy in my life. Like this little creature, I can trust God will send help when I need it most. Like the skunk, I may have to struggle first. Sometimes I don’t know I need help until I have come to the realization I cannot do it alone anymore.

Another insight our gracious Lord gave me was the importance of listening to my inner spirit when it tells me to “go a little further” when I do not want to. Perhaps someone is struggling with some loss or pain in their life and I could be used by God to comfort or help them out. I could be the very person that shows someone in doubt of God’s presence in their life by showing God’s love by my action.
When I hear that inner voice telling me to do something I do not want to do; I could be missing out on an opportunity to serve God by helping someone in need.

If I find myself in a position where I feel God has lead me but I feel inadequate, I can be sure He will give me the means to reach out to another soul. He says in His word that nothing is impossible for Him. When Moses reacted in fear to God’s command to talk to Pharaoh God sent him an assistant; why would I be any different in times of uncertainty?

Oh, and in case you are wondering. No, I did not make it to church this particular morning. But I was in the presence of God just the same. How much more could I worship our Lord than by caring for one of His creations? Church is very important; but sometimes God has something more important to do for Him, like helping someone who, like our little friend the skunk, is in bad shape.

Riding on the Coat-tails of Christians

I am grateful for the time off that I have in order to spend time in the presence of God. I am given thoughts to ponder over that normally I would be too busy to hear. One thought is the fact that for as long as I have been a Christian, I have been riding on the coat tails of Christians. Trying each time to adopt their beliefs, hoping that if I spent enough time around them I would come to believe. There is one problem with this. Perhaps two. By putting all in following other Christians I am led into truths and untruths. I will continue to doubt God's presence in my life as long as I try to buy into the different beliefs out there. Until I read the Bible for myself and allow God to speak to me through His word and having different passages or verses stand out, I will always be wondering, "Does this Christian have the truth?" I will try to believe what they believe because I want to believe, not because I do believe. Big difference.

Most of my life has been spent riding others coat tails in the hopes of being accepted, liked and adopting others beliefs. I never trusted my own instincts, my insights. I would see something in a vision and then dismiss it as my imagination as soon as someone doubted what I saw. I would doubt faiths because there were so many and each could tell me why they believed what they believed. The more Christians I tried to follow in hopes of coming to the truth, the more confused I became and eventually I would leave the faith altogether.

Today it is different. I no longer believe I will gain truth by riding the coat tails of different Christians or faiths. It is time to begin the journey of trusting God for the answers and then making a decision of who I believe practices God's truths closest to what I come to believe the word says. It may be confusing at times, that is ok. I don't believe God intends me to understand everything. He does however, desire for me to follow the truth as much as I can according to my understanding of truth. If I genuinely seek truth, if I pray before reading, I believe our Loving God will not disappoint me. I have hope today. Hope that I will begin riding the coat tails of the Holy Spirit as He directs my thoughts and insights.

Repentance

I was reading Matthew chapter 3. When I came to the verse where John says we must show our repentance by the way we live, it made my stomach jump. I looked up the meaning of repentance which read; a radical change in ones life as a whole,which forsaking sin and returning to God. This caused me to ponder over sin in my life and where I have not been willing to give over certain sin that is destuctive in my life, as well as other sin I justify by saying everyone does it; or I will try better next time, but is this true repentance? Sometimes I do repent sincerely, but again, I must ask myself, am I now willing to give over the sin in my life, and begin living as God would have me; if I am not, then my next thought would be, "will I pray for the willingness to give this up." If not, then I have a real problem. How can I live in God's forgiveness if I am not willing to give up the sin? I am not talking about sin that we truly want to be rid of, I am talking about that sin we call 'little" and excuse by telling ourselves, "everybody does it." We are no longer of the world so this does not excuse our sinful behavior. I am to look different than worldly people no matter the cost. When I look at the cost of not blending in, I am embarassed. The cost is embarassment when teased about be a goody two shoes; humiliated when taunted in front of co-workers for not joining in with the gossip. This is nothing compared to the cost to Jesus for our sins. He did not sin and suffered physical, emotional and yes, even spiritual pain. When I look at this I am put to shame. Reading the word daily and pondering on it has been opening my eyes to how important it is to remember who is my real boss in life. Isn't it amazing how one little verse can get you thinking about somethin in your life. Amazing.

God gives into Moses, why?

I have been reading the book of Exodus and have to share that I am really shocked at how much Moses talks back and argues with God! I am amazed that God only got mad, as far as I can tell, once, and even then, God gave Moses what he asked for by having Aaron go with him. I realize I am only to the 6th chapter, but my goodness, I cannot believe God did not punish Moses or at least give him hell for not listening and trusting him! Why would God insist on Moses going alone so he could see God's strength through him? Instead, God gave in to Moses and gave him what he wanted. This did not help Moses' trust in God as is shown when again Moses refused to trust God by doing what he was told. If God gave into everything I prayed for that I was too scared to do, how would I gain trust in my relationship with God? But if he makes me walk through the fear, then I will see God's guidance and strength in my life and it would build more trust in God's activity in my walk.

I was laid off from work this week and was surprised at how little fear came over me. I look forward to the time off to get into the word and really ponder Gods messages for me. It is amazing how much God talks to us through His word when we are ready to listen.

God's Spirit Hovering over me

...and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters"
I wonder, if God's Spirit hovered over the waters, could it also hover over and around me? Would that be His presence? A smile grew across my face as I pondered on this. Picturing God surrounding me with His love and protection. His pure white spirit glowing all around me. I thought to myself, with God's Spirit all around me, not even Satan could penetrate it and bring me harm. With this picture continously playing in my head, I could stay calm and loving when approached by angry or judgemental co-workers and people I meet on the streets. As long as I focused on this scene and praised God for His presence within and around me, worldly clamour would have no room to invade my thoughts. It was a peaceful walk around the neighborhood this morning as I meditated on the presence and love of God in my life. How much better my day would be now because of this thought God had graciously brought to my mind. I prayed for His presence to continue penetrating my thoughts as I carried on through out the day.

So Many Faiths, So Little Knowledge

Today brought a sense of low spirits. Not sure what brought it upon me. Could be the two extra pounds I gained this last week. Somehow I doubt it. As I continue to replace worldly desires for time in God's presence I have become aware of how many religious beliefs there really are in our world. How is one to know who has the truth? And honestly, is it possible that any of these religious groups, churches or faiths have the one and only truth? They all claim to and can prove to me why they have the truth by taking me to passages in the Bible. Sometimes I think it would be interesting to sit each and everyone of these groups down and let them all hash out their beliefs and may the best man win. But this would do nothing for my relationship with God. I desire with my every fiber to worship and honor God in His truth. To believe without doubting that He exists and that the Bible is the one and only word from Him. He promises in his word that I will know truth and the truth shall set me free. Well, I must not know the truth yet, as I do not feel free at all.It is as if God is distant. The Prophets of old give me consolation. They too cried out to God and felt he had gone away from them. That he abandoned them. Yet they continued to believe in God; they did not allow his being absent to take away thier faith in Him. so I too will continue to believe in God as the one and only God. The Creator of all things. Many have come to believe in their teens or college years. These appear to have strong beliefs and faith in their particular religion. I wonder, had each of these been approached by a different denomination, would they have accepted that particular faith as the truth for them? Is it the first to sit down with us and show us the truth the ones who win us over? Perhaps God is leaning me towards not becoming involved in any denomination right now. Perhaps He is guiding me to continue reading His word, crying out to him in prayer and spending time in His presence. Again, so many faiths, so little knowledge for me to truly know and have faith in a particular religious church or organization.

Sacrifice

I am beginning a journey of practicing the presence of God as a form of prayer. (It was suggested by a Pastor). To take quality time thinking about God and pondering on His Word. This weeks reading of the Bible has brought up love and sacrifice. I ask myself often, "do I really love God? I say I do. I feel like I do. But now, I ponder on whether I am getting love mixed up with hope. Could I be hoping God is real and that I will have a relationship with him. Do I give up self to serve Him with a willing heart? It saddens me greatly to realize the true answers are a resounding no. I speak of loving Him with all my heart and soul; but I continue to live as a worldly person when at work or out socilizing. I am filled with anguish knowing that I am weak in this area of my spiritual life. It gives me relief and hope however to know I can repent and ask for Gods power to strengthen me for service. Even in my marriage, I tell others how much I had to give up to be married. Now I know that there is a difference between giving up something for someone you love, and sacrificing for someone you love. At least I think I know. For me to sacrifice means to give up things I love. It is giving up self that I may serve God wholely. Small things like turning off the t.v. when my unbelieving husband is not home. Or going into my study and reading the word when he is watching something I know God does not wish for me to fill my head with. Sacrificing out of love is not joining in at work with the gossip or complaining because I don't want to look like a prude. There are many other ways I can sacrifice my comfort level out of love for God. But I must remember I cannot do this without His spirit within me. Without Christ, I can do nothing. I have proven this to myself over and over. I can pray for my mouth to speak only goodness and two minutes later be mumbling some complaint under my breath at a co-worker; or yelling out the window at a neighbor who is letting her dog use my yard for his bathroom! I can justify that she wrong in doing this; but if I were to ask myself humbly, "what would Jesus do in this situation." I am put to shame and asking for forgiveness. I am not done with pondering on sacrificing out of love. As a matter of fact, it brought up the idea that perhaps I do not understand Godly love as I thought I did. I am looking forward to the coming six months or so of being in the presence of God learning all He has for me to learn about being his disciple. I am hoping as the weeks go by we will see positive, strong and joyful changes in my walk. It is my hope that through this journey I will come to have a very real, honest, mature faith in my belief; and that this growing faith will be built on a personal, strong relationship with my heavenly father and savior Jesus Christ.

Having an honest relationship with God

I have been reading Job this week and am amazed at how he spoke to God. It brought to mind how David spoke to God in the Psalms as well. These two men spoke openly and honestly with God. If they were angry, they said so. If they were scared, they cried to God for help. Even when they felt God had abandoned them, they continued to reach out to him for guidance. As I continue reading Job I am reminded over and over again how God responds to our prayers no matter the mood or the petition. How often had I felt I could not go to God when angry or hurt. Who was I to complain to the Almighty! Would he respond in anger? Would He be disappointed in my lack of faith? No. Over and over through scriptures I am shown how God wants me to reach out to him as a daughter reaches out to her father. Not having a healthy father image growing up, this was difficult for me to comprehend. Only through a church family who showed me the love of our heavenly father through their unconditional love for me, did I begin to see who God, my heavenly father really was. That I could trust him even in the worst of situations. The trauma of my childhood has shown me that bad things do happen to us, even as God's children. However, through the healing process I have begun to understand that no matter the situation, God is with me. I am free to get angry with him and pout, I am free to question his will. And I am free to cry out in desperation for His help and guidance. This coming year of 2009, instead of making resolutions; I have decided to put my energy into practicing being in Gods presence no matter what I am doing or where I am emotionally. As I continue to read the great prophets I will remember how God responed with love and discipline to those who depended on him. I want this kind of relationship with God. I want to continue to learn from those in the scriptures who have traveled before me. I look forward to the journey with my Heavenly Father. What I hope to gain is what Job said in chapter 42 vs 5. My ears had heard of you, but now my eyes have seen you." (NIV) Yes, I believe I too, will see God when I am willing to look through spiritual eyes. I believe this is God's will.